Green jumper - the back story

All of that rain back in England reminds me of the skills we learned during our special forces training. One of the key things to remember was to keep your clothes dry and stay warm. As a result, when in covert operations in hostile territory and heavy rain we were taught to strip off smear ourselves in camouflage paint (or mud, if necessary) and pack our clothes away in sealed plastic bags. This may seem bizarre, but that way we had something dry to put on when we camped from the night.

After being snagged by the in-law's fishing line I spent a while recuperating in Northern Ireland. Unfortunately it never stops raining in the province... and when I went out walking (in my slightly dazed state) my training would automatically kick-in. I am no longer welcome in Tescos, the Post Office, or several of the local pubs. After the last incident my brother-in-law offered me a green jumper to cover me up (and save the locals from feelings of inadequacy)... and that's why I have a great fondness for (and large wardrobe filled with) green jumpers

Tagged

So the Gorse Fox tagged me. I though it meant they had found the cake stash I'd taken from meeting rooms, however on further investigation it seems to mean that I have to say 8 random facts about myself. So here goes:

1. While I was in the far east, I was treated as a God in Papua New Guinea
   
2. I was lost for two days in Africa and cared for by a troupe of baboons
3. I own a property in France. It's a modest little place on the top of a hill, lovely views. In fact (with some help) I've managed to upload a picture!
   
   
4. I own so many green jumpers that I need to have a trailer attached to the tank when I drive to my place in France
5. I'm not sure that there are enough peasants villagers to staff my chateau in France
6. I've actually got a masters degree in advanced Computer Science and I've written papers on theoretical deep thinking for super computers - I just don't like to brag (and that's why I passed the PRPC Fundamentals course was so easily)
7. My Volvo is actually armour plated after an incident with some lively natives in Nicaragua. It was cheaper than importing a Hummer.
8. My wifes family are from fishermen stock. In fact that's how we met. I was scuba diving off the Irish sea as part of my training for the Navy Seals (after a special invite from the President - lovely man by the way). There I was swimming away in my special neoprene suit (optional doughnut attachment), when I got hooked by this Irishman. They took me to their home, let me rest and fed me, and then my wife walked in. That was it for me! Anyone who let's me sleep and eat is fine by me!
   
9. I have issues counting in lower digits. Big numbers are where it's at.

Now, an apology:
A note was passed around the office which indicated that one of the new garden chairs on the patio was broken. I would like to apologise as it was me that broke it.

We were having an impromptu meeting in the patio, I was leaning back while a bit bored, rocking on the chair, and it gave way a bit. If anyone would like me to take it away, I'm sure I can get some money for it on ebay - A Boston original!

Right, I think I've found out who has stolen my jumper.

There is a collegue who works on "data migration", whatever that is. Someone sent me some photographic evidence -



If I catch him wearing it...